DisneyGroom’s Year in Review and a Salute to All Nations (But Mostly America)

I know my last post did not include my usual humorous tone. So buckle-up and enjoy. Every blogger on the internet is doing a Year in Review, so you certainly don't want to read another one.  Instead, I’ll include some predictions for next year and a couple of suggestions for new runDisney products. 
 
Prepare yourself- this will be my last post for 2013. No need to be sad. You will just have to wait until next year for more of my wit and insight.



Mark 2013 as the year DisneyBride created a monster.

During 2012, DisneyBride and I had only done a couple of 5Ks.  Then in 2013, the monster appeared. Somehow I managed to complete eleven 5Ks, one 8K, one 20K, one half marathon, and two marathons.  Now I am looking forward to my first endurance series (Dopey Challenge). It is quite amazing what can be accomplished when you are married to the ultimate enabler. 



More important than just completing the races, (and I never in a million year thought I would say this) I now enjoy running. It takes about 7ish miles for me to hit my stride, but when I do, don’t step in front of me. Even more impressive, I have managed to get DisneyBride to a place where she enjoys trails. (I probably have nothing to do with this change, but as much as she resisted hiking while we were dating, I am going to call this a victory for me). 



Looking Forward


runDisney challenges
Dopey, Glass Slipper, Dumbo Double Dare, Coast to Coast. BRING IT!  I'm taking it all!

GOING LONG:
I hope to run a 50K towards the end of 2014. I have a few options for races in my area, so we will have to see what level of crazy I want to achieve. Further, I hope to run a marathon with DisneyBride. (I can hear her laughing across town.) This may be the most ambitious goal for the year, she has been pretty adamant that she has no desire to run anything longer than a half.

BACON:
If you are a potential sponsor: take note! I am still hoping to be endorsed by a bacon company. I maintain that bacon is the perfect mid-race fuel and that I should be the face that promotes the idea.


#BACON at Mile 18 #SPACECOASTMARATHON

MARATHON TRAVEL
I want to run a marathon in another state. I am open to suggestions, please feel free to post them in the comments section.

And now... my ideas for new products fellow Disney Runners would enjoy.


Proposed runDisney Merchandise for 2014

2013 seems to be the year that runDisney has presented us with a a number of (what I believe are) pretty absurd products. Not the least of which are commemorative race-specific shoe sole inserts. "Hey DisneyBride, I am going to hang my sweaty shoe insoles on the wall, right next to our medals." With each nostril insulting whiff, you will remember why we keep the running shoes in the garage. So in the interest of more crazy ideas, here are a few of mine. If you are reading this runDisney, I better get my cut.

Mickey Nipple Guards

Nipple chafing is serious. And crossing the finish line with bloody nipples is not very Disney. Mickey nipple guards serve the dual purpose in shielding younger spectators from a bloody running spectacle, and in bringing "Hidden Mickey" hunting to an entirely new level.

Jabba the Hut Anti-Chafing Gel 
No one knows chafing better than Jabba the Hut.  With everyone starved for Star Wars merchandise and/or a Star Wars themed race, the gentle giant is a marketer's dream. 




MuShu Alarm Clock (porridge sold separately)
Getting up for early races is the worst. I am glad Disney Bride wakes up easily for races (yet not any other time of the year). A small annoying dragon throwing insults is the perfect way to wake up and get you motivated - be it for race day or a training run. 





I had two other ideas, however, I don’t think a runDisney Bobcat Goldthwaite alarm clock would be approved for licensing. And the Sam Eagle “A Salute to All Nations (But Mostly America)” themed alarm clock complete with fireworks display may present a fire hazard.  But it really is so spectacular, I'm showing it here for your enjoyment.


 



If you ever see me write about how I love to get up early, rest assured I have become a zombie or have been replaced by an alien or robot. You will know what to do.


Grey Stuff Goo (energy gels)

Sugary, delicious, and portable fuel for running. This needs no further explanation. 


 
 


Finish Line Food: Tonga Toast with Pineapple DoleWhip topping

This combines two of my favorite Disney treats - in a cool, rush of sugary heaven. Perfect #Recovery food. Not merchandise per se, but this is what I want, so I assume everyone else wants it too. 





We just ran 26.2 miles and paid a lot of money to do so.  With an army of the finest chefs at their disposal, I think Disney can do better than three stale crackers and warm hummus.



So these are my top picks.

What products would you like to see runDisney offer?

-Disney Groom









4 comments

I completely agree with you about the shoe inserts. This does not make any sense to me! They are just going to getting smelly and dirty SO quickly, plus nobody will see them.

As for post-race food, I would love to see some free Dole Whips offered!

Reply

I agree, dole whips at the finish would be fabulous! Actually for the price we pay for the races, I think everyone who finishes should get a voucher for a free breakfast at a disney restaurant. Don't you agree?

Reply

I hope Disney eventually provides better post race food. I hope they follow the lead of so many other races that provide hot food and cold drinks after the race.

-DG

Reply

I actually prefer for the food to be at the finish line. The runger can get pretty bad right after a race. Further, I wouldn’t go back to my hotel room before eating. So, I would just end up being the smelly guy ruining some family's breakfast.

-DG

Reply

Post a Comment